Who You Should and Shouldn’t Invite to a Wedding – Part 1

Who You Should and Shouldn’t Invite to a Wedding – Part 1

Have you guys ever gone to a wedding and felt like the couple needs to
say I don’t instead of I do? If so, you’re not alone, because according
to a survey conducted by weddingwire.com, 27% of the people they polled said they have attended weddings even though they
thought the marriage was a mistake. So ladies, speak now or
forever hold your peace. Would you ever attend a wedding
you didn’t approve of?>>No! And guess what? I don’t want nobody at my wedding
that doesn’t approve of it. That isn’t sending good vibes and
good energy and good love. Now I will say this, there is
a difference between I approve of this, and between thinking are these
people going to last forever? Are they soulmates? Do I think they’re the perfect couple? And I think this is utterly
a wrong mistake, I don’t approve. When they go to say speak now or forever
hold your peace and I can’t hold my peace, I shouldn’t be there.
>>[LAUGH] [APPLAUSE]>>If this person has been awful to her, then I’m not attending no wedding
that I don’t approve of [CROSSTALK]>>In my case, I’ve had examples where I’ve had
friends that had destination weddings, and I’m like, I’m not about to spend all
this money to go see you get married, and I know it’s not gonna work out. That’s what I’m talking about, if I don’t approve of it,
I’m not spending my money, extra money. Now, if it’s local, yeah, I might go.
>>But that’s even different saying like, I don’t think it’s gonna last which hey,
they might end up being 25 years together and then you regret not being there.
>>No, what I have to say is the two people and they know who they are,
are currently not together. So I was right.>>[APPLAUSE]
>>So that’s it.
>>Did you go?
>>I didn’t go.
>>Okay, so yeah.
>>You didn’t go.>>Interesting.>>I don’t.>>How did they handle you->>Cuz a wedding is supposed to be a support.
>>Yes.>>I have a question, though.>>That’s the reason why you invite people.
>>I have a question though. Were any of these people
really close to you guys?
>>Yeah.>>So how did they handle you saying you’re not gonna go?
>>They just had to handle it.>>[LAUGH]>>Mine was different. I went to a wedding that it wasn’t
that I didn’t approve of it, do I think that they’re soulmates and
they’re gonna last forever? That’s my opinion, my opinion is
different from disapproving and being like I don’t stand by this,
I don’t agree with it, I think it’s wrong. Two different things. Now granted, if they go on and
are married for the next 30 years, I’m gonna be so happy and now if I
didn’t go, I would have regretted that. Does that make sense?
>>Okay.>>You got to trust people’s free will, just because I don’t agree with it, and I
don’t maybe see the sparks that they feel, that’s just my opinion, that’s not right.
>>[APPLAUSE]>>One thing I’ve definitely learned after going through a divorce,
and being where I’m at now, I’ve taken more seriously the attending
of a wedding, and what I mean is this. Yes, it’s a party, yes, it’s something
where you collect the favors, you throw the bouquet, but it’s
actually something much more symbolic. You are about to make history with that
couple for the rest of their life. And when I look back now, when I was
going through hardship and our marriage really needed the community that holds
you down, talks you off the ledge. And just supports you and
mourns with you, I look and I see those true people out there. You guys are really out there, the ones
that stood by me in my wedding, and really stood by me in life. Those are the people you
want in your wedding.>>That’s awesome.>>That’s sweet.>>Because you’re supposed to be witnesses.
>>Yes.>>That’s what the guests are, they’re witnesses to a covenant
that you’re making with God.>>Makes you think twice the people you invite.
>>I don’t know, I’m on the fence with this because I
feel like sometimes there are lessons that people have to learn on their own.
>>Exactly.>>And if it was a close friend of mine, and we had a conversation,
I’m gonna be 100% honest with you. But at the same time, if she really wanted
me there, I would silently support her. I wouldn’t feel good in my soul
not attending her wedding. I do know a person, you guys,
who did this to a friend. She did not approve of her friend’s
wedding, she didn’t go, and actually, she’s the one who got divorced and
her friend actually was at her wedding. So sometimes, did you follow me there?
>>Yeah, kinda sort of.
>>Kinda sorta, okay.>>It was the opposite.>>It was the opposite.
>>Yeah.>>What I’m saying is sometimes->>Her marriage didn’t last. Sometimes we don’t know. Maybe you may not approve and hey, they really love each other and
they’re gonna work it out. And that’s what happened
with my friend’s couple. They’re still together.

100 thoughts on “Who You Should and Shouldn’t Invite to a Wedding – Part 1

  • Point is, just cuz your loved one doesnt feel the sparks doesnt mean there isnt any. I would never disapprove of anyone getting married unless there was cheating abuse etc.

  • See, I really don’t agree with the things being said here. Just because YOU may not agree with a couples decision to marry, doesn’t mean you are right. If a marriage is a mistake, it is their mistake to make. It’s your job as a family member/friend to support the couple and pray for the best outcome.

    Too many people out here are making other people’s business their own.

  • Yo, I really think yall just hate Adrienne. What did she do? She is blamed for her husband's mistakes, blamed for her opinions, blamed for everything. Like damn

  • I’m biracial (moms Mexican& dad is black) and my dad can’t stand to even think about me and my boyfriend of almost 4 years. My boyfriend is White. My father said he will in no way support us in a (future) marriage, and even after 4 years my father doesn’t want to even MEET my boyfriend cuz then he thinks he’s “giving in”.

  • This opinion is from another video i can't find right now but dammm they can't evwn bring up the Kardashian's around Adrianne THEY. CAN DO NOOOP WRONG YO lmaoooo sheshh

  • I'm getting married next year and all of a sudden I have family members coming out of the woodworks asking for an invite but they never reach out to me any other time.

  • I was actually a bridesmaid in a wedding I didn’t approve of. The groom was a creep…legit creeped me out. And now 3 years later I no longer talk with them.

  • No one has a crystal ball, no one knows for sure if it’s gonna last. You go to support your friend or family member getting married, whether the marriage lasts or not.

  • Adrienne is amazing on her own channel. I don't know what happens on The Real… She becomes annoying and half the stuff she says makes no sense.

  • My old neighbours got engaged and EVERYONE knew they weren’t right for each other. Barely anyone congratulated them on their engagement and people even had secret bets on how long it would last – I know, harsh! Anyway, they married in the middle of the June and by the beginning of July they were over.

  • That's why they say "If any of you feel that these two should not be wed, speak now…or forever hold your peace." Meaning you should say it now… or otherwise shut up for the rest of your life when it comes to talking about their marriage. You guys, that's not just a saying that's said at weddings. That's your chance.

  • I was suppose to be the maid of honor at my best friends wedding. I said yes initially, but a week later I told her I couldn't stand there and watch her make a mistake because he was controlling and abusive. 3 years later she finally left him after abuse and I wish I would have been there to drive her out of there or be there to object.

  • Nobody from the outside knows what really is going on between a man or a woman or any sort of couple. I see couples who I wouldn’t imagine them together and be like why? But there’s always something between a couple that others won’t get. I will say beforehand to a friend to be careful and if I think he’s bad for her, that I would be worried but I wouldn’t not attend her wedding. That’s just fucked up.

  • I mean there are ways to handle the situation to me I have a home girl and she recently got married well her and her man argue all the time they cuss at each other but they don’t hit each other like it seems like it never is a good day for them I don’t see how that is love so my honegitk asked me to come to her wedding and did I like him I told her straight up no I don’t like him And tbh I don’t think he is the one for you I was being honest but the thing is I didn’t approve of the weeding but since that is my ride or die I’m going to respect her descidoons And let her do her becade she grown I might not like her decision but I mean I will respect it that is just me if it doesent work then it doesent work and she will learn from her mistake but if it does then it does but I would go into the weeding angry I would go in there being happy for my Bestfriend getting married whether I agree with it or not 💯💯

  • I hate weddings, but o would never attend a wedding that I didn’t approve of for any reason.. you are at a wedding as a witness and I will not be a witness to anything I feel is wrong

  • We all know Tamar has attended a wedding where she didn't feel like the person her sister was marrying is a good person to marry.

  • It's an awful situation to be in when someone you care about is with the wrong person, but I think it's best not to say anything, because people have to learn their own lessons in life. I went through that a few years ago with a cousin of mine where I knew the woman he was engaged to was not right for him. I thought she was very bossy, controlling and took herself way too seriously and whenever she was around him I felt that he completely lost his spark and sense of humour and he was not the life loving positive person that I used to know. It felt to me as if he was just 'settling' for her. I never said anything though and was silently supportive. In the end he actually ended up calling off the wedding when he realised she wasn't right for him. People often just need time to wise up on their own to see someone is wrong for them.

  • I’m not doing it. I agree with Adrienne. Weddings are to come together and be happy for the couple. If I’m not happy and I see that it is toxic or not meant to be I’m staying at home. I agree with Loni. You just gotta handle it.

  • People wouldn’t be disagreeing with whom you’re with or not attend your wedding if you kept your RELATIONSHIP issues to yourself.

    Then again, I’ll be hat person that would attend the wedding. If I didn’t approve of someone and my friend marries them, I’ll still go. Maybe God has a plan for them. Whether it’s divorce down the road or being with each other eternally.

  • When a very good friend of mine told me she was getting married, I was kind of surprised and felt a little sad, but she was so excited and no matter what people told her she wasn’t going to listen, so I decided to stand by her, was there for all the preparations, my kids were in the bridal party, and I was there for her, when she started having problems I was the second after her family she came to, I counseled her, held her hand and was there for her divorce, which also made me really sad cause we don’t “believe” in divorce. Just be there for your friends, say your peace if you both are that mature but be there emotionally and be supportive, don’t ve rubbing things in peoples faces.

  • Adrienne your marriage is like 2 years now u r still in honeymoon. Wait untill 5 years later than u can say whatever you wanna say about marriage 😐

  • its trur what adrienne is saying i wouldnt invite someone who talks down in my marriage and if i didnt like your spouse who hated you getting married why would i wanna go

  • I'm not attending a wedding for bad people or a bad relationship. If there is abuse, neglect, or other significant toxicity- why the hell would I want to attend that wedding? It's absolutely anyone's choice, but I absolutely do NOT want to make it look like I support or condone those kinds of things. If I just think there's a possibility they aren't compatible like Adrienne said or another small thing but otherwise there aren't red flags, yes I will keep my mouth shut and wish them many blessings. My view on how compatible they are is just an opinion and an opinion that may not even be true won't trump me being there to add support and positivity to my friend's marriage.

    My ex best friend got engaged to her on-again off-again boyfriend turned baby daddy. They were mutually abusive to each other in every way (her more than him); the relationship was so volatile and disgusting to watch. They argued violently and gave off so much negative energy that I, as an empath, would literally feel sick to my stomach being around them. I congratulated them on the engagement because she was pregnant; I knew for a fact she would be really upset if her best friend didn't support, and I didn't want to cause negative emotions to effect mi sobrina. She had a high risk pregnancy, was having complications at that time, and I couldn't risk her losing the baby because of something I did or said.

    They didn't make it down the aisle but if they had a wedding would I have attended? HELL NO. Marriage is a serious commitment and I will not condone people making a mockery of a sacred union by coming together knowing they should not. I will not compromise my beliefs just for someone's wants. It it's something that isn't a big deal, yes I'll attend and fully support. If it's destructive, don't even disrespect me like that by asking me to come. Also, if you do not support my union with my future husband, do not come to my wedding; be honest and decline if I don't already know not to ask you.

  • I have a friend that got married to a guy I didn't think was right for her because they got married too quickly and i feel she rush into it just to get away from her parents and she is religious and he is not . But I still went because she was a close friend and basically if I said anything it wouldn't have helped the situation at all and she would just get mad at me and still do it.

  • I LOVE Adrienne but ever since she’s been married she think she knows everything 🙄🙄 she’s tooo sexy for her husband 😑😑

  • Years ago I went to a huge wedding that was sad. The groom was and still is a controlling asshole who hid behind the mantle of religion. My sister several years later said the now husband, engaged in a battle with his toddler daughter because she wanted the diapers with pandas rather than plain diapers. He had to control everything. He isn't physically violent but he is psychologically abusive.

  • My best friend got married to someone I didn't approve of. On the otherhand I WOULD go to a wedding I didn't approve of and I did attend it. It will give me an excuse to dress up and look good.

  • What if it’s a double wedding? I attended the first but am I obligated to go to the second wedding that is coming up?

    It’s fishy to though because it’s been almost a year this April the couple got married in Ohio… but the bride never changed her profile from engaged to married.

    It’s a funky story to begin with. The couple aren’t “really my friends” but are my boyfriends friends.

  • Idk. Because I just wasted $200 on a braidmaids dress and the couple isn’t together so I learned for one thing don’t as me to be in anymore weddings.

  • Well I’ve been to a wedding where the bride was someone close to me & I knew she cheated on her soon to be husband with her own cousin & a coworker of ours . Soooo in the back of my mind I did think “wow, atleast be honest before you marry this man . He deserves to know” she didn’t so .. that’s no longer my business so I did attend . 🤷🏽‍♀️ but I did think “this won’t last , it’s built off of lies”

  • What does (anyone who reads this) feel about bridal showers at work? I got an email invite (thru work email sent out to my dept) to a bridal shower that my dept was holding for another employee, during work hours, in one of our conference rooms. I don't know that anyone there is invited to the wedding though. Plus, it just seems weird to me to have it done at WORK. Isn't that a "personal life" thing? If it was some friends getting together after work, that's different. I don't know, I felt some type of way about it. Am I wrong for feeling like this?

  • I heard of a couple that married ages ago, and her future sister in laws were taking bets on how quickly they would get a divorce at the reception party. They are still happily married, and the other brothers were all divorced. Sometimes you just marry into a family of assholes.

  • I can’t stand my best friend’s boyfriend. I am gonna be hella torn if it gets to a point where they’re gonna get married…

  • My cousin met a man that is from Mexico she met him there, and I didn't think she should do that. Actually nobody thought she should cause she had to go to live to Mexico and we didn't knew the guy.

  • Dont invite haters to your wedding period,Loni messy she single no one should have that say who should get married let folks do them , if u dont like it stay from the wedding

  • Adrienne I want your Shirt so much. I'm over here distracted looking at you and imagining myself wearing it lol 😍😍😍

  • If you're friend is getting married for the 3rd time or something, you're allowed to sit the next one out 😉

  • When it comes to going to a wedding for me personally it depends where I am at financially. I wasn't able to go to my brothers wedding because he was a good number of states away and there was no way I could afford the plan ticket or was even in a situation where I had enough leave to drive there. I still gave them my congrats but I couldn't go.

  • Adrienne lipstick is soooooo beautiful!!!!!!!!!!!! i love that color and looks bomb on her!!!!!!!! LOVE!!!!!!!!!

  • I went to a wedding where I disapprove of the guy my friend was marrying, he left her to be with another woman and came back to her, I thought they were not going to last but I was wrong, they are together for 8 years now

  • Yes. My brother. I had to stand in it. My mom and dad paid for my dress, the wedding itself and were wanting me to support my brother. I knew in my gut it wasn’t going to work but only opened up to my parents. It lasted 3 years before a divorce. Both my parents my brother paid the price biig time.
    You have an intuition for a reason doesn’t mean others will listen to it though

  • I would go to the wedding. I am going to support the individual that invited me, not necessarily the marriage. If it does fail, I want my friend to know that I have their back.

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